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Jesus

Mommy, when Jesus has lots of things He has to do, does he have time to play with children?

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Jerusalem

As we’re watching a show on the National Geographic Channel on Jesus’ arrest, Z asks “Mommy, is Jerusalem a sad place?”.

she has no idea how complex that question is…..

Jesus heals boo boos

“Mommy, when Jesus touches people he heals them.  When my boo boos heal, that means that Jesus touched them.  That’s what that means.”

Best of Z

I’ve been keeping a notebook filled with “Z”isms for the past 1 1/2 years.  I started it when Z was able to speak clear sentences and started saying the cutest, funniest and sweetest things.  So, I’m going to share my favorites.  I hope you enjoy.

12/09 (2 years old)

The other night at dinner, Z filled her fork with food and enthusiastically exclaimed “Put it in my tummy!”.  She then proceeded to dump it down her shirt.

Z saw a turtle sticker on a truck and exclaimed “Turtle sticker on truck!  Turtle swimming in truck!  Funny!”  and proceeded to laugh hysterically.

1/10

In the car, daddy and I were having a conversation.  Z yells “Mommy, stop talking!”.  We ignored her and continued our conversation.  A few seconds later, she says “Are you listening with your ears?  Stop talking Mommy!”

2/10

I asked Daddy to look up a phone number for me.  Z wanted something from me and I asked her to wait a minute because Daddy was getting me a number.  She had a meltdown and started screaming “I WANT A NUMBER! I WANT A NUMBER!”  I said “ok, do you want a number 1?”.  She said “NO!  I WANT A ZERO!”.  So when daddy got back, she asked daddy for a zero.  He drew her one and she was happy.

“Mommy, I love you too much.”

3/10

I was in the bathroom only to have Z screaming and crying at the door.  “Let me in Mommy!  Mommy, let me in!”.  When I came out, she said “Mommy, I was crying.  I want Mommy to let me in!”.  I said “I want Z to stop crying!”.  Without missing a beat, she said “I want Mommy to stop pee peeing!”

4/10

Z said that clouds cry when it rains.

Z was talking about her friend L.  She said that she likes L because he is nice.  He kisses her forehead and cheek.  And zerberts her cheek and arm.  She said that L is her prince.  I said that I like L too and that he is nice.  Z said “No Mommy.  You like Daddy.  I like L!”

5/10

me:  Z, do you know how cute you are?

Z:  I’m not cute!  I’m SMART!

6/10

conversation before bed:

Z:  I’m going to cry in bed tonight.

Me:  why?

Z:  because I’m going to miss you

7/10

Z picked up her toy hammer, looked at me and said “Mommy, I’m going to hit the wall and it’s going to be loud, ok?”.

Z told us that she likes to fart at school because it makes the boys laugh.

8/10

Z got to experience South of the Border for the first time.  She thought it looked like a party.  While in the bathroom, she kept asking, very loudly, if she could touch the “Big Man”.  I clarified, just as loudly, “You mean the big statue of Pedro?”.

9/10 (3 years old)

“Mommy, I just did a party hat poo poo!”

“Mommy!!!  My pee pee is yellow like the sun!”

10/10

Z:  Mommy, I didn’t knock over the cup.  It fell by itself.

Me:  How did the cup fall by itself?  Cups don’t move.

Z:  I don’t know!  Go ask the cup!

11/10

“Mommy, do germs eat blood?”

Z was mad that she had to take a nap.  So, she came crying out of her bedroom, stood in the hallway, took her underpants off, threw them into the living room, and marched angrily, bare bottomed, back into her room.

12/10

Z was angry with me the other day and told me she wanted me to go away.  She wanted a policeman to take me away.  I told her that if I went away, I wouldn’t be able to see her and asked who would kiss her boo boos.  She paused, thought for a second and said “Jesus!  Jesus will kiss my boo boos!”.

Calling from the bathroom “Mommy!  Somebody pee peed in my underpants!”

“Mommy!  I play with a capital ‘P””

1/11

I steam cleaned the carpets in every room and said to Z “Look at our clean floors!”.  She said “Yay!  Is someone coming over?”.

2/11

Z had a dream that she went to school and the teachers were teaching snakes how to swing on swings.

“Mommy, what letter does M&M’s start with?”

“Mommy, mmmm hmmmm is not an answer.  Mrs. Linda said that mmm hmmm is NOT an answer!”

I told Z that she could not have any more mango until she ate 4 more pieces of steak.  She said “NO, SIX!”.

I was teasing Z and said that I was going to eat her up because she tastes yummy.  She then licked the palm of her hand and said “Mommy, when I lick my hand, I don’t taste yummy!”.

I was singing “Mama says they’ll be days like this, they’ll be days like this my mama says….”.  Z interrupted me and said “I want a different day!”.

3/11

“Mommy is a rockstar!”  (said while twirling in a dress I made for her)

“Mommy, can I be Michael Jackson for Halloween?

Me:  Z are you hungry?

Z:  I just want chopsticks and ice cream.

Z was talking about baby hooks.  “Baby hooks are something you use to hang babies up with.  And I wrap them in bandages.”

“Mommy, I wasn’t yelling!  It was a different type of talking!”

4/11

conversations in the grocery store as we’re waiting to check out:

Z:  Can we buy some candy?

Me:  No.

Z:  Why not?

Daddy:  Because it’s not on the list.

Z:  Can I write it on the list?

and a few minutes later….

Z:  congratulations Mommy!

Me:  for what?

Z:  for being a good girl!  She then proceeds to lift her dress up to her chest, reach into her underpants, then holds out her (empty) hand, and says “Here’s some candy!”

Me:  Z we do not offer people candy from our underpants.

Z’s blessing at dinner:  “Thank you God for our food.  Thank you for apples, thank you for strawberry shortcake, please help Mommy and Daddy have a good day and please help Mommy and Daddy listen to ME!  Amen.”